So, there was a 24 hour period for people to come up with the best possible (purely theoretical) punishment for book pirates. Â I have to say, we have some delightfully inventive and evil people around here. Â I like that.
And four winners, from the our social medias.
From the blog, James Marshall’s entry:
I think their computers and phones should be locked to Rickroll any book or video they try to view for a year AND have to pay Rick Astley every time his video comes up.
On Livejournal, J. Percival says:
Force them to cover comprehensive, top-drawer health insurance for all the authors they’ve stolen from — for life. Even if they stop pirating, they’ll still have to forever cover from any author whose work they pirated at any point in their heinous careers.
Paxfelis on Tumblr came up with this gem:
â€œBook pirates should never have any privacy ever again. Â In the cameraâ€™s eye everywhere they go. Â No doors on any of the rooms they enter, to include bathrooms, closets, and doctorâ€™s offices. Â No access granted to anyone, but any password-protected sites and items are displayed big and bad everywhere they go. Â Any misdeeds are published or displayed. Â In extreme cases, someone large walks behind them with a loudspeaker narrating their every move, and that person does not sound like Morgan Freeman. Â Oh no. Â Gilbert Gottfriedâ€™s voice lives in Shaquille Oâ€™Nealâ€™s body, and he does bad vocal impersonations, and that is the narrating of your life.
and my personal evil favorite, from Sandy Hall on Â Facebook:
They should be sentenced to forced listening via headphones of 50 Shades of Grey read by Gilbert Gottfried every day for up to 5 years.”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkLqAlIETkA
(Gilbert Gottfried seems to be a trend. Â I wonder if he’s aware of this potential new career sideline?)
Congrats to the winners – your copy of CLAWED will be in the mail as soon as I get your mailing addresses!